Emma's Dilemma

"That doesn't mean you're, ya know, knocked up," Kate fumbled to recover and save face.

"But what if it does?  I mean, yeah, I've had no other symptoms or signs which is why I wasn't even aware that I'm so late, but that doesn't mean I'm not knocked up.  And right now would literally be the worst possible time for me to be pregnant; I've slept with both Michael and Eric, and now I'm single, without a car and sleeping on a couch.  The last thing I need right now is a baby.  The gods can't be that cruel, right?" I attempted to crack a joke, but it didn't make either of us feel like laughing.  My revelation had sobered us both up quickly and I walked to the kitchen to pour out the rest of my vodka cranberry.

I stood there at the sink, watching the drink spiral down the drain and losing myself in my thoughts.  I was already weighing my options and I wasn't even sure if I was pregnant.  I nearly jumped out of my skin when I felt Kate's hand on my shoulder.

"It'll be okay, Emma.  I'll take you first thing in the morning to pick up a pregnancy test, if you want.  Hell, I'll even get up early and get it for you while you're still asleep!  Anything, you know I'm here for you," Kate pulled me into a hug.

I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes and running down my face, soaking into Kate's shoulder and still she stood there, holding me.  As I cried and Kate whispered soothing things, I realized something.  I had showed signs.  They weren't physical, but my emotional state had been out of control lately and that could be chalked up to pregnancy hormones.  My sex drive had been through the roof, which was also completely out of character for me.  What if I was pregnant when Michael and I were together, which threw off my mood and emotions and made me end our relationship?  In that moment, I didn't know what to think.

Finally, I pulled out of Kate's hug and sniffled, smiling at her through my tears. 

"Thanks, Kate.  I think I'll be okay.  But I'm exhausted now and want to go to sleep.  And I do want to go first thing tomorrow to buy a test.  That way, I won't drive myself crazy with 'what-ifs' and not knowing."

Kate nodded and said goodnight before heading to bed and closing her bedroom door.  I buried my face in my pillow, and quietly cried myself to sleep.



Early the next morning, I awoke to Kate standing over me with a bag in her hand.

"I couldn't sleep so I went without you," she blurted, thrusting the bag towards me.

I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes, and warily took it from her.  I already knew what it was and sighed as I got up off the couch.  I hugged Kate briefly as I made my way to the bathroom.

I opened the pregnancy test and read the directions carefully.  It was a digital test so the results would be simple to read with no guess-work involved.  I sighed again and left the test sitting on the counter as instructed.  Three minutes slowly crept by as I waited to find out if my life was about to drastically change.

With shaking hands, I picked up the pregnancy test and read the crystal clear results.