Girl Talk

"Oh, wow," Holly mumbled, her mouth full of pizza.  Her brown eyes were wide as I went over the whole Michael-losing-his-damn-mind story.  She shook her head, chewing thoughtfully.

"I mean, that's just crazy.  I've known Michael for ages and I've never, ever seen him lose his temper like that.  You guys must've been so freaked out.  Just...wow," she trailed off. "Anyway, I wanna hear more about this Eric guy you're seeing!  You said you spent the night with him...?"

I sighed, grabbing another slice of pizza.  It tasted heavenly, just the right amount of grease, cheese and pepperoni.  The crust was to die for.  I took a bite and shrugged, indicating there wasn't much to hear.

"Here's the thing.  He basically insisted I come sleep over, but that's exactly what we did.  Slept.  In the same bed.  That's it!  Like, he kissed me but made no moves at all.  I wore my cutest, most revealing tank top and short shorts, he was in his underwear.  I thought for sure we were going to have sex.  Nothing.  Nada.  He spooned me all night, we made out a little but that's it.  I don't get it.  I mean, it was really nice, I enjoyed it.  But it wasn't what I was expecting," I rambled on, feeling a well of disappointment.

Holly laughed, scrunching up her nose the way she always did when she found something amusing.  I was bewildered as to what she found so funny and made it known by pouting.

"So, let me get this straight.  You guys had an awesome date, no sex, lots of talking and connecting.  Then, your night was ruined by Michael and then you had a shitty day dealing with the aftermath.  Sounds more to me like he actually cares about you and doesn't see you as a sexual object.  You shouldn't be pouting, you should be happy!  I wanna meet him."

I loved Holly's optimism and enthusiasm, but I still felt achingly disappointed by my sleepover with Eric.  I thought for sure that steamy, all-night sex was on the agenda.  Sex would've been the ultimate stress reliever but he hadn't shown interest.  I still felt tingly and excited when we'd made out, but the passion was lacking.  It occurred to me that he'd never even had an erection.  Ugh.  Maybe I was over analyzing the situation.  Guys can't be expected to be raring to go 24/7.  If our next sleepover or date or what have you turned out the same way, then I could be concerned enough to ask him.  I realized I'd zoned out when I noticed Holly staring at me expectantly.

"Well?" she inquired.

"Sorry, Holly, I was thinking and not really listening.  What'd you ask?" I forced my mind to clear itself from thoughts of Eric so I could focus on our conversation.

"I asked if you're excited about next week!"

"Huh?"

"Next week.  Doesn't your promotion kick in on Monday?  And isn't your ultrasound on Wednesday?" she was eyeing me carefully.

"Oh, my god.  I completely spaced.  I've been doing that non-stop lately!  Yeah, I'm excited.  My schedule is switching to a mid-shift, noon til 8:30.  I think I'll like that.  Plus, getting away from the phones will be great.  I've trained on workforce management for a few shifts now and I think I'm gonna love it!  I'm actually kinda nervous about the ultrasound.  But finding out the gender is something I've really been looking forward to!"

"That's so awesome!  You'll call me as soon as you find out, right?  Have you thought about names?" Holly was positively beaming with excitement.  It was no secret that she had a case of baby fever and was now living vicariously through me.  Truth be told, I'd considered quite a few names.  I'd found myself gravitating towards names like Olivia, Natalia and Gianna for a girl.  Boy names were a little tougher for me.  Carter?  Gavin? None of them felt quite right, but I still had months to make up my mind.

I shared my name ideas and Holly gushed over each one.  She was always so cheerful and encouraging.  I'd say Holly was my most stable and reliable friend.  It made me sad how little we'd seen of each other the past few months.  For the rest of the night, I made it a point to focus on our time together.   Being around Holly put me in a better mood.  We laughed and chatted and gossiped for a few hours before I made my exit, promising to meet up again soon.

When I got home to Kate's apartment, I wasn't surprised to find her drunk and out of it.  It was pretty much a daily occurrence.  Although I was used to it by now, I still found it irksome.  Thankfully, the apartment complex had a cute, spacious 1.5 bedroom unit opening in three weeks.  It was designed to be a 1 bedroom with a small office area, hence the term 1.5 bedroom, but the space would make a perfect nursery.  I vastly preferred that setup over all of the 2 bedroom units at the other complexes I had looked into.  I could put up with three more weeks of Kate's drunken chatter.  I knew I was just hormonal and irritable.

The next month was looking to be busy and full of positive changes in my life.  If only I had known just what my future had in store.

Picking Up the Pieces

His response surprised me.  I knew he'd be concerned, but I certainly didn't expect him to be awake and reading my message at this hour. 

I replied to him immediately.
"That's really, really sweet of u but I can't leave Kate here alone.  We need each other right now and we have a lot to talk about in the morning.  First thing on my agenda after that is getting a new phone.  I promise I'll call u then.  If the offer still stands tomorrow, I'd love to spend the night with u.  Kate's working at the club and I don't wanna be alone..."

The chat window indicated that he was typing.  I could feel myself growing more tired with each passing second but couldn't leave the chat without seeing what he had to say.

"Are you sure?  I'm worried about you...please call me tomorrow asap.  I need to see you and hold you and make sure you're okay.  I felt like I'd been punched when I read your message.  The thought of you being hurt and scared makes me sick.  I know you must be exhausted so I'll let you get to bed.  Sweet dreams, kitten.  I'll see you tomorrow"

I smiled at his sweet message for the first time since I'd left his apartment.  It felt like a lifetime ago that we were cozied up on his couch, kissing and talking about everything we could think of.  I wanted to devour Eric, get to know every thought, secret and quirk he held.  He was one of the most riveting men I'd ever met and the fact that he was willing to date a pregnant woman made him one of the most admirable men I'd ever met.  I cradled my belly, knowing I already loved the baby I was carrying despite how screwed up my life had become.  With a heaving sigh, I stretched my aching back and settled back into bed beside Kate.

* * * * * * * * * *

Pulling my thick hair into a loose messy bun, I turned to stare at my profile in the mirror.  I wasn't quite prepared to make the switch to maternity clothes and had been favoring flowy blouses and cute dresses.  Today, however, I was too exhausted to care about wearing cute, flattering outfits.  I'd chosen a stretchy grey tank and my favorite yoga pants.  They still fit perfectly but the clothes emphasized the curve of my belly.  Knowing I'd be seeing Eric soon, I suddenly felt self conscious.  I rummaged through my tiny closet space, selecting a small black hoodie to slip on and cover up.

After my heart to heart with Kate, I'd gone about replacing my phone and changing my number.  I'd spent hours on the phone, starting with Tom, Michael's dad.  He had been appalled by what went down and apologized profusely on his son's behalf.  My next call was to Officer Reilly, where I informed him I'd reconsidered and would be pursuing a temporary restraining order.  I'd realized that this was no longer just about me, it was about my baby.  Being under undue stress wasn't healthy for either of us.  Knowing a restraining order would be put in place gave me a certain peace of mind.  My next call was to my mom, letting her know everything that had gone and providing her with my new cell number.  She'd been sympathetic on the phone, although a little aloof.  I made a quick call to my friend, Holly, telling her we needed to catch up later in the week.  She promised to get in touch.  My final call was to Eric, confirming that he still wanted me to come spend the night.  He sounded very concerned and reassured me that he was eager for me to arrive.

With a final look in the mirror, I added a touch of blush and mascara to liven up my face.  I grabbed my overnight bag, my purse and my keys.  I only had one item left on my agenda before I could head to Eric's to relax and distract myself.

I knocked gently on my neighbor's door, half hoping he wouldn't answer.  To my mild disappointment, he cracked open the door.

"Hi, there," I began, "I just wanted to thank you for what you did last night.  You didn't have to step in, but you did.  These are for you."

He looked down at the box of gourmet cupcakes I was holding awkwardly towards him and smirked.  I hadn't noticed how handsome he was the night before and felt my cheeks redden when he caught me admiring his shirtless body.

"That's sweet of you, thanks.  I have no tolerance for abusive douchebags, though.  Plus, he was disturbing my sleep.  I'm Rob, by the way.  I've seen you and your girlfriend around, haven't had a chance to introduce myself before," he replied, reaching out to shake my hand.

"I'm Emma.  Anyway, I'm on my way out but I wanted to let you know I appreciate you stepping in."

He smiled broadly, holding up the small box and peeking inside.

"Thanks for the cupcakes, red velvet is my favorite.  Hope to see you around sometime!" Rob winked as he closed the door.

Smiling to myself, I headed towards my car with a newfound bit of energy.  I'd been sad and exhausted and feeling sorry for myself all day long, but I'd soon be wrapped up in Eric's arms, letting the stress melt away.  Maybe the day was looking up.